Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
