oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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