whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
