Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Two words: blizzard sex
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
