I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
