garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Randomize