The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
