so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
cat food counts as protein by the way
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
so much tequila, so little girl.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
