youre lurking in front of me
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
