Who wears a wallet chain?!
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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