im gay
i know
yea but for you.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Randomize
