from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize