Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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