yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize
