I need help removing her.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
