i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
I am spending my child support on dildos
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
