Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
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