I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
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