hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
