Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
