I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize