and i looked up. we had an audience...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
