Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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