Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I am one with the molecules
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize