it wasn't lemon gatorade
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize