I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
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