I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
