I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
