"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
