If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize