i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
