he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
