I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize
