i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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