Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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