I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
