i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
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