Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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