I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
