she takes plan B like it's going out of style
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
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female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Randomize
