Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
