Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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