Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
he laminated a picture of his dick.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
