i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
im holly from the hills drunk
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Randomize