I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
