we have pet lesbian snakes
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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