BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize