Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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