Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
my shit smells like andre
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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