Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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