do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Randomize
